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Money Anxiety

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Money Anxiety

Money anxiety is not an official mental disorder but is often treated. It manifests itself in a variety of ways, but I want to explain how anxiety and money affect my own life.

As I’ve mentioned here before, I have been diagnosed with anxiety so my feelings and experiences may be amplified to what you feel.

When it comes to money anxiety, I experience it in a few different scenarios.

Pleasing people

Your willingness or ability to spend money in a relationship should not determine the strength of that relationship. If that’s the case, is that a relationship really worth having?

In my case, it’s directly correlated with my former spouse. She got dealt a few bad hands in life, so I was willing to spend beyond my means to make her happy. Not that the spending inherently would make her happy, it was more of a reluctance to say no due to financial constraints.

That inability to say no stuck me with debt that set me back on my personal finance journey. Obviously, there are other personal factors that resulted in these circumstances, but that’s the gist.

Fitting in

I’ll echo what I said in the first section, your willingness or ability to spend money in a relationship should not determine the strength or quality of that relationship.

Thankfully, I’ve learned from/outgrown this, but it used to be a real challenge for me. Growing up, I never really felt like I fit into a particular friend group. So I developed relationships that I’m thankful for now but otherwise appeared destructive.

Destructive from a personal and financial perspective. As I said, I’ve since outgrown that tendency, but it’s something to be aware of for yourself.

Long-term thinking

This section will specifically talk about my house. The one I’m currently renting. Before we bought that one, we were two years into a mortgage in a different city. The plan was to live there until my son was school-age, and then we’d move to a city with better schools.

The house we ended up buying, I found on a whim. We looked at it, loved it, and put in an offer. It stretched us SUPER thin from a financial perspective. I mean, exhausted all of our savings (including retirement), and we were incredibly close to being negative on our budget.

I knew in my heart that it was the right long-term decision, and I was willing to go through the pain/struggle in the short term for it.

Little did I know that circumstances would change dramatically in the next year or two. Plan for the long term, but also plan for short-term variances (even the dramatic ones).

What I know

Because of my profession, my training, and what I’ve read, I’ve seen what happens when you make poor decisions.

That said, many (if not all) of my financial choices are heavily scrutinized. When I say “financial choices” I mean the larger ones. Day-to-day spending and bills are factored into my budget, though I do a review (as you should) regularly to see where I can trim excess spending.

When I make a financial decision, my money anxiety kicks into gear, as I always second guess myself. I run through the possible scenarios that could play out.

Tim Ferriss calls it fear-setting. The Stoics call it premeditatio morum. It’s a practice of expecting the worst and planning for them as they will happen. Expect the worst, hope for the best. Not a bad thing to do, in money and in life.

My Last Reflection

The Importance of Being Handy

Related reading:

The Psychology of Money

My House and What Brought Me Here

Living with Anxiety and Depression

Job Loss: What to do

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Losing your job is like a big punch to the gut. At first, it’s hard to process, but then your head starts spinning. What will I do for work? How will I pay my bills and put food on the table? What will my family do?

Taking a deep breath is a good first step. After that, it’s time to put a plan into action. Many of you could be experiencing this right now, given what the world looks like today.

In this article, I’m going to lay out how to financially prepare before and in the midst of a job loss.

First thing

As I said, this will be a big shock to absorb. Give yourself some time to realize what has happened. More than likely, you’ll go through the 5 stages of grief.

Unemployment

One of the first things you should do is apply for unemployment. There might be some hoops that you have to jump through, but one imperative item you need to confirm with your old employer is that you were let go and without cause. Resigning or being fired for cause disqualifies you from collecting unemployment.

Set money aside for taxes. Unemployment does not withhold FICA taxes or state income tax (if applicable). If you normally receive a refund, you might get a reduced refund or none at all. Plan accordingly.

Severance

The next step has to do with severance. If you were let go or fired without cause, your company will, most likely, offer it to you. It isn’t required by law, but most companies do it. Take severance home and review it closely. Don’t sign right away. Once you’ve reviewed it, take it back and negotiate.

Job Search

Starting looking for a new job right away. It does not pay to wait. All jobs are first come first served, set get searching as soon as possible.

Be picky, but pick up a job of some sort that will provide you with some cash flow.

Is now the time for a career change? Have you been dissatisfied with your industry or line of work? Do you have the skills and/or qualifications to make such a change? These could be questions to consider.

Finances

With regard to any debts that you have outstanding, call your creditors and see if they will let you defer payments, or at least make reduced payments, for a while. Also, make the minimum on your debt payments. Having cash available for other necessary items is more important.

Relentlessly cut expenses and review your budget with fine-toothed comb. Again, cash flow is your friend in your new situation so the more liquidity you have the better.

Pad your emergency fund. Obviously, this is something that needs to be done before you lose your job, so it’s imperative that you listen. Common advice is to save 3-6 months’ worth of expenses. If you’re self-employed and are responsible for payroll and other business expenses, it’s prudent to have 6-12 months worth saved.

HELOC? That stands for Home Equity Line of Credit. Is that something you are able to do? Is that something that you want to do? A HELOC turns the equity you’ve accumulated on your home into a loan.

Insurance

Life and disability insurance are very important coverages to have, but a just loss and loss of income could derail those coverages. There is a rider that can be added (waiver of premium) at the time of application so your policy stays in force while you are unable to make payments. *Be advised: this has to be done when you sign up, not after the fact.*

Healthcare is another important item to take care of. First off, if you have any appointments you were waiting to schedule, do it now before your coverage changes. The next step is to find a suitable replacement for your current coverage. This could be taking your spouse’s insurance, finding new coverage on the marketplace, or signing up for COBRA.

Retirement

Avoid dipping into retirement savings – this should be your last resort. Retirement savings accrues most effectively when you leave it alone. That’s when compounding works the best. Not only that, withdrawing funds prematurely will subject you to income taxes and an early withdrawal penalty.

Do you have 401(k) loans? If the answer is yes, you’ll be required to pay that loan back in its entirety in the next 60 days, otherwise, it’ll be considered a withdrawal. Again, taxes and a penalty.

Make a decision on what to do with the old retirement plan – Do you roll it to your new employer, roll it to an IRA, or leave it with the current institution. If you have a lower account balance, your HR department could require you to transfer it or cash out. Each company is different.

Related reading:

Employer/Employee Negotiations

Why Financial Literacy is Important

Your Go-To Budget Guide

How Does Financing a Car Affect Your Car Insurance

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According to experts, 44% of Americans rely on auto loans to buy their cars. Are you one of them? Maybe you’re planning on doing some auto financing, but want to make an informed decision.

Besides your monthly payment and interest rate, you should also consider your car insurance policy. Learning the basics about the insurance requirements for a financed car will prepare you for when you make your purchase. Don’t know what we’re talking about?

[Read more…]

How To Find Money Management Success – Create a Dashboard

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I just answered a question on Facebook about a recent podcast interview featuring some bill pay app creators. My interviewees had discussed just how difficult it can be to quickly and efficiently pay bills. “I don’t understand the problem these guys are presenting,” the poster said (I’m paraphrasing….). “I just go to my bank and use their bill pay app every other week. No problem.”

I wish it were that easy for everyone.

Let’s face it. Most of us have one big problem with our financial profile: we’re disorganized. After 16 years in the financial trenches, I’ve seen it far too often to think it’s anything other than a widespread problem. Most of us pay bills on sixteen different sites and have two old 401k plans with former employers, our current job’s plan AND different 529 plans for each child. It’s impossible to manage everything. I’d ask people with all of these different investments and bill paying problems how they juggle everything, and the answer I most often heard was, “I manage it very poorly.”

Yet moving investments to a single provider is a scary proposition. We’ve all heard of Bernie Madoff and don’t want to trust one person with our money. We also have all heard of diversification. Having different plans ensures that I won’t have all of my eggs in one basket.
So we have two problems: safety and diversification….and the fact that by having your assets spread out it’s impossible to track. How do we reconcile these two ideas?

It’s easier than you think.

dashboard

Could you drive a car with three different dashboards?

Think About Driving A Car

When you drive a car, do you have one set of gauges or several? Of course, you only have one set of gauges. It’d be impossible to drive if you had five different dashboards. Imagine! Yet, when you think about your car, it’s a diversified collection of inputs, all working independently. However, when you put it all together, these gauges make your car easier to drive. You get the right data at the appropriate time.
That’s what we’re looking for with money management success….we don’t want to get rid of diversification. Our goal is to create a single dashboard.

In Your Personal Life

There are three areas you should look at with your money:

– Budget and bill tracking. Budgets fail when you’re making decisions about spending without knowing where your money goes each month. Items like a mortgage or rent payment and grocery bills are easy to track, but how much do you spend each week on entertainment? If you don’t track your expenses, it’s difficult to project the future or find any money management success. The gauge you’re looking for to help with daily money management is an app like Mint or Yodlee, that will automatically track your expenses so when you’re planning next week’s expenses you know how you’ve spent money in the past.

For budgets, Mint will allow you to set up alerts so that you’re notified when going over budget categories. YNAB (paid subscription) will help you think differently about your budget and keeping every area in check. People who like the old-fashioned envelope system may be attracted to MVelopes, an automatic way of instituting envelope budgets so you don’t have cash sitting around your home.

– Investments. Many apps will help you track your investment life. In particular, Mint can create a pie chart of your overall diversification so you can easily make investment decisions. Companies like Jemstep allow investors to input their goals and then recommends investment shifts. FeeX will look at all of your investments across platforms and tell you how much you’re paying in fees….an important gauge to see when investing. Zillow has a cool app that will track any real estate properties you own. NVestly is a social media site that not only helps you see results across your whole portfolio, but also makes investing social (you can see others investment pies…but not the amounts of money they have in any investment). While each of these is different, using a couple of these apps can help you make better investment decisions without worrying about having too much money at a single brokerage account.

That said, brokerage houses all offer a diversified collection of investments through different companies. Just because your portfolio is housed as Fidelity, for example, doesn’t mean you have to have all Fidelity investments. They work with a wide range of providers….and you only have to visit one brokerage site to see everything. One dashboard but still diversification!

– Big Picture. You should be able to see how your net worth is growing at a glance. Mint and Yodlee, among others, will give you that quick at-a-glance overall picture.

With Your Business or Side Gig

If you’re self employed, you’re even more crunched for time. You have your personal books AND business metrics to track. As a fan of the excellent management book The E-Myth Revisited: Why Most Small Businesses Don’t Work and What to Do About It, I know that the keys to business success are in systems and data. How much data you have and how quickly you can use that data to your advantage are important. That means three things:

– Platform. If your business or side-gig project isn’t build on a solid footing, you’re hurting. A web presence built by experts like 1and1.com means that you won’t have to worry about the “bones” of your business being difficult for customers or employees to navigate.

– Reporting. Using your bank’s application to track inflows and outflows (as well as setting up a Mint or Yodlee account for your business) can help you stay on top of business expenditures and inflows. Ask your accountant about great business tracking apps and software that they recommend.

Overall

Staying diversified doesn’t mean having money scattered all over. By focusing on systems, building a dashboard, and reliable business help, you’ll find that you’re able to more quickly make financial decisions that move the needle. That’s how you build long-term wealth!

Photo: Steve Jurvetson

Afraid To Meet With a Financial Advisor? Here’s How the First Meeting Goes – 2GYM 057

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Never met with a financial advisor and worried about what will happen? OG & Joe pull back the curtain this week and show you how the meeting SHOULD go while cautioning you against how it MIGHT go.

Subscribe to the podcast through iTunes and new episodes will show up every week!

Never subscribed to a podcast before? Here’s Apple’s fantastic tutorial.

Would you rather listen on your smartphone? Try Stitcher or the iPhone podcast app. We’re available on both platforms, as well as Windows Phone, Blackberry Podcast App, Podcatcher, TuneIn, and more!

 

Show Notes

<> Open

<> Amazon.com – Hunting for gifts this holiday season? If you’re shopping on Amazon.com, how about using the 2 Guys & Your Money Amazon link? You’ll still get the same great Amazon deals while also helping the show. Thanks! Here’s the link.

<> Meeting With a Financial Advisor For The First Time

What questions should you ask? What should you expect? What SHOULDN’T you expect? Joe & OG have a discussion (and a few disagreements) about that first meeting and how to choose an advisor.

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Teaching Your College-Aged Child About Money – 2 Guys and Your Money 45

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Subscribe to the podcast through iTunes and new episodes will show up every week!

Never subscribed to a podcast before? Here’s Apple’s fantastic tutorial.

 Would you rather listen on your smartphone? Try Stitcher or the iPhone podcast app. We’re available on both platforms.

In the episode, OG & I discuss how we were both horrible with money while in college. We learned many lessons, but today’s college-aged child needs to know about topics many parents didn’t confront. We describe the college landscape and how to help your child cope with financial complexity while in college.

Show Notes

<> Open

<> Hotels.com – Score up to 50% off the published rate on a hotel stay AND help out your favorite podcast all at the same time.

<> From Broke College Kid To Financial Whiz

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Gambling, Smoking and Other Fun Ways To Ruin Your Budget

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Daniel Wesley is the founder and CEO of CreditLoan.com, a website that educates consumers about various personal finance issues. Among some of the topics discussed are bad credit loans, credit cards, auto financing, and many other credit and financial help issues. Connect with Daniel on Twitter and Google+. 

 

Paychecks never seem to go as far as you think they should and your piggy bank is looking pretty empty these days. Some of the choices you make every day could be hurting you financially. By identifying the extraneous items you’re spending money on and eliminating those purchases, you can make a significant difference to your finances over the course of a few months or a year. Here are five common spending habits that could be wrecking your budget:

 

5 Spending Habits Wrecking Your Budget

 

– Gambling 

It’s the thrill of a shot at winning it big, but whether it’s the lotto, casinos, or a work pool, you can waste a lot of money gambling. A few dollars here and there on scratch-off tickets when you fill up with gas start to add up quickly. Quit cold turkey, avoid situations where you might be tempted to gamble, or seek help if you think you might have an addiction. Think of it this way: you’re likely to make more money by investing than gambling it away.

 

– Smoking

 

Many people consider certain parts of their lifestyle a normal expense rather than a luxury, but cigarettes are expensive and costly to your overall health. Sit down and add up the amount you spend on cigarettes over the course of a week, month, and year. Many people will be shocked at the actual figure. Like gambling, there are ways to kick this habit. Stop on your own, seek a doctor’s assistance, or join a program. However you decide to eliminate this expense from your life, your body and wallet will thank you for it.

 

– Extraneous Spending on Beverages

 

Like most people, you probably look forward to a caffeinated pick-me-up at some point in the day, but consider how much you’re spending on extra beverages each month. From coffees in the morning to soft drinks when you’re out at dinner (which are usually the same price as a whole two-liter bottle at the store!), the cost of buying drinks at restaurants and convenience stores adds up fast. Find money-saving alternatives like refilling a sports bottle with water throughout the day or making your own coffee at home. However you work it out, if you stop buying beverages, you’ll save money at every meal.

 

– Eating Out

 

You might be surprised to learn that the average American spends approximately $2,500 per year eating away from home. Now multiply that number by the number of people in your household, and you’ll get a better idea of why eating out is not a smart move financially. This doesn’t mean you need to completely deprive yourself, but stick to going out for special occasions rather than a couple of times per week. Make more meals at home, and cook a variety of dishes to prevent boredom. Save (and use!) leftovers. Buy more store brands or stock up on items when they go on sale. Pack a lunch for work. All of these are great methods of cutting your food cost down considerably.

 

– Paying for Unnecessary Services

 

We often pay a lot for convenience, but how much of it is really necessary? Do you truly not have the time for some things, or do you simply not want to do them? If you make the effort to limit the services you pay for that you could actually do yourself, you’ll be shocked at how much you will save. Mow your own lawn. Clean your own pool and house. Change the oil in your vehicle yourself. Give yourself a pedicure. Learn how to groom your pet. It may not be as convenient, but the money you save will really add up.

 

Going On the Attack: Planning Your Future

 

Once you’ve identified and eliminated your bad spending habits, re-examine all of your monthly expenses and create a budget; the next time you go to the store, don’t allow yourself to spend money on things that will exceed that budget. Audit yourself and evaluate the true value of what you’re spending money on to find even more ways to cut back, whether it’s your cable package, your cell phone plan, or the magazines you subscribe to.

 

The last step is figuring out what to do with all the money you’re no longer throwing away. It probably goes without saying that the best thing to do is save. Having extra funds stored away is always a good idea; unforeseen expenses can quickly crumble your financial well-being, and having money saved away is the best way to protect yourself and your family.

 

Being mindful of your finances is important at every stage in life. Minimizing excess can be a difficult process, but cutting out unnecessary expenses can significantly ease financial pressure. Recognize your bad spending habits, find a way to eliminate them, and take steps to make better choices in the future. Your piggy bank will be filling up before you know it.

Photo: Stephanx80

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Avoiding Sex With Strangers and Other Poor Money Decisions

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Thursdays are when we hear from the Other Guy (OG). Sit back and enjoy:

I recently stumbled across two interesting sites on longevity. Both www.livingto100.com and gosset.wharton.upenn.edu/mortality accomplish the same task – they pose a litany of questions about your health, wealth, mental and spiritual well-being and use your inputs to predict how long you’ll live.

For the record, I’m planning on living until 135.

The questions these sites ask fall into two different categories: things you shouldn’t do to your body and things you should.

My unscientific analysis surmises that it’s generally a bad idea to:

a) smoke
b) drink
c) avoid seat belts
d) have random sex with strangers (I know you think I’m kidding – but seriously, according to these two sites, it’s not a good idea. I can’t seem to imagine why…)

All this “research” started me thinking about financial longevity – what are the 4 stupidest things you can do with money that will kill your chances of a healthy financial life, no matter how well you try and recover in other areas? Can we draw some parallels? If we’re smart enough to show you the Top 7 Financial Hacks to Avoid, we can surely pull together the four worst ways to train wreck your financial life.

 

Here’s my list:

 

1) Borrow money from your 401(k) or other retirement plan. Why? This is financially like smoking 3 packs a day. Stop doing this. “But, O.G., I’m paying myself back with interest!!” Right. You’re paying yourself back these pre-tax dollars with after-tax money. Don’t get me started on the arithmatic of how much you’ll pay.

2) Rack up credit cards and roll the balances into your mortgage. Obviously this isn’t as common as it used to be, but it’s still happening. Paying 2.99% for a J Crew sweater for the next 30 years is freaking dumb. This is like having six Jack and Cokes a day. Your liver isn’t going to quit tomorrow, but it’s not there to crank through your whiskey addiction at 6 ounces a night either.

3) Not paying attention to your lifestyle costs relative to portfolio value. This has come up in my practice a number of times recently. I don’t care how much money you have – you simply cannot withdrawal $100,000 per year from a $1,000,000 portfolio forever, even if David Copperfield is your buddy. It’s simple mathematics. It won’t last forever. Be conservative. Wear a seatbelt – and go slow.

4) Scattering money with no clear and coherent plan or direction. You guessed it – this is like putting your…well you get the idea. You’re not in college anymore. It’s time to settle down and put all your stuff in one place.

That’s my fantastic four, or fabulous four, or fashionable four, or…well you get the idea. What are yours? I’m curious: what’s the top financial mistake you’ve seen that will submarine an entire financial plan?

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So You Want to Manage Your Own Money?

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A friend texted me this morning.

“We should talk soon. Julie is coming around to the idea of us managing our own money.”

It seems easy, right? My initial reaction to my friend was, “That’s awesome!” because it is. There are few things more satisfying than achieving your financial dreams and knowing that you climbed the money management mountain yourself.

No “money-god” came down and did it for you.

You didn’t need the Powerball numbers.

You actually plotted a financial course and landed safely at your destination.

For my friend, and for you if you’re about to embark on this journey, there’s good news and bad news: the good news is that it isn’t difficult to manage your own money.

The bad news is that to effectively manage your own money you’ll need to be ready to face some fairly difficult tasks.

 

Two Types of People

 

When I was a professional advisor, I’d meet some smart people who wanted to jump into their own money management and wanted an expert with an opinion to look over their shoulder, hold them accountable, and make sure they didn’t miss any “I” dotting or “T” crossing.

…and then there were other, often equally-smart people who wanted to hand it over to me and have someone else take care of it for them.

Believe it or not, most advisors I knew preferred the latter type of client and loathed the first one. Someone questioning their motives? Someone asking “why are we doing it this way?” all the time? That’s preposterous!

But if you’re going to ever learn how to manage your own money, you’ll need to be the first type, not the latter.

The steps aren’t difficult:

 

The Steps to Managing Your Own Money

 

My kids are reading myths in school. In the story of Hercules, he faces a series of challenges to achieve is goal.

I look remarkably like the guy on top, but I’m a little paler and not quite as naked. And I have less hair.

You’ll have a series of gauntlets in your way too, if you want to manage your own money.

1) Write out your goals. I’m not talking about writing:

Retirement

College

New Boat

Fall Deeper in Love

Real goal writing has a specific time, dollar amount and vision attached.

I want to be able to live on $65,000 per year (in today’s dollars) by age 65 without having to work every day. With this money I’d like to: (here you write your bucket list, which should include visiting every NASCAR track in the country).

That’s a goal you can shoot for and be excited about (except for visiting the track at Pocono, which I thought was pretty overrated).

2) Next, you write out all the hurdles in your way.

– I have $25,000 in credit card debt (separate by interest rate, term, amount)

– I have to put two children through college

– I know nothing about money management

3) Then, you find one of the nearly bazillion financial calculators online (you can use our powerful little PlanWise calculator here on the site!) and figure out how much you need to save to reach your goal.

– I need to save $250 per month to reach my dream if I achieve an 8% return.

Armed with your money management return information, now you figure out how to come up with $250 per month.

– Tweak your budget

– Pay down debt

– Take on more work

4) Before investing, though, you have a big problem. You have to insure yourself against some of the huge “what if’s” out there for you and your family:

What if you die?

What if you are disabled?

What if you have a car accident?

You’ll need to create a will and evaluate insurances.

5) Finally, you begin the heavy task of research to find investments that have historically achieved 8%.

 

No Step is Difficult, You Just Shouldn’t Miss One

 

As you can see, when you take on the hard task and decide to manage your own money, getting it right will be difficult. Each area demands time and energy:

– Planning, milestones and tracking

– Budget, income advancement and debt reduction

– Insurance need projection and comparison analysis

– Estate planning

– Investment allocation, picking and monitoring

These are five basic money management steps, but each packs a punch!

 

I Don’t Mean To Imply You Can’t Do It

 

As soon as I finish this piece I’m calling my buddy and talking him through these points. Before he takes on the task, he should know how long the financial security road really is. Going in with your eyes wide open is half the battle if you plan to win the “manage your own money” game.

He can do it, and so can you!

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